Donuts Which Are Evil and a Tool for the Creation of a Systematic Hellscape

Think about how you feel when you eat a donut, if you do so.  If not I describe in personal terms: First, the soft delight of chewing and ingesting.  But if you know anything about crack, it is a lot like crack.  I'm sure someone has said it's the crack of the food world: a cheap guzzle and rush surge almost instantaneously concurrent with the ingestion, a rush that rumbles along your gullet searing intestinal excitement in its exhaust, whee!  Adrenaline or the chemical equivalent thereof.  And then the inflammation begins, or so I assume, because as a tissue bruise flares up in the wake of the wake, so too I become heated and brutally quick-tempered, mood shearing off some stupid cliff I have navigated again and again in pursuit of the ethereal delight Donut, and irritation, irritation, oh the crash of total disgust, a wave of rotten irritation cutting in bone level, this is your physical form all whacked out and You are subject to It.   

Listen, I know it's not just me.  One night in full fledged Donut Rage I defenestrated the remainders from a picked over dozen, and in the morn, those birds who gathered over the alley to sun themselves in the dawn were force-chirping like possessed madmen, talking violently over each other, a cloud of clamor so inappropriate to the new rhythm of the day.  The donut feast was down to crumbs and those birds were juiced.  So it's like a basic chemical thing, I'm saying, and the donut thus proves to us its insidious form, so legal, so tempting.

So it worries me, you know?  That cops are constantly munching on these Wheels of Tyranny.  It is a hilarious stereotype - and it is right under our nose.  Sure, there are a lot more big-ticket problems of our police state, desperate institutional habits that sustain and develop man's criminal desire to herd other men, a culture of fear and terror.  And certainly society is not in a place where such bureaucratic nightmares could just dismantle themselves, nor be dismantled by the small crowds which can only keep them in check, not defeat them.  So what can we attack?  I say Donuts.  Our American cops are all juiced up on this frenetic disc, casually abusing a truly dangerous substance - one which influences anger, short-temperedness, and deep set irritation.  Sure, I might be a little sensitive, but it's even worse that these guys are stuffing their faces with multiple Rage Cakes in a shift like a junkie trying to get up to just feeling normal again.  I realize I am making a bit of an assumption, based on a cultural rumor and, you know, common sightings of actual cops actually hanging out at corporate donut chains.  Do all cops eat donuts?  I think we probably need to see some numbers here.

It sounds mocking, but I could not be more serious about a general concern for positive state of cops bodily mood and temper.  We need some real data exposing the real physical effect of Demon Donuts on a man's general composure, do it the whole way with a control group and stuff, how does an immediately threatened and bureaucratically protected man react, especially given easy access to weapons.  (Well, I'm pretty sure that document lies deep in some files somewhere.)  I deeply suspect many trigger fingers quaking in some stage of donut withdrawl, absurdly trying to handle ultra power of gun technology, have gone haywire and murderous, spasmodically tweaking in that forgetful wash of adrenaline amnesia.  Real ugly stuff.  It's just another layer - some kind of glaze or frosting, I suppose - on the wretched story of American inner turmoil, unresolved problems of ultra-normativeness, and maybe we need to see how exacerbated the problems have become, right there in our news panic boxes. 

Though it seems cute to focus on this fluff issue when the problem is so dark and deep, I am a big fan of oblique tactics, wielding absurdity as a weapon.  And let's not forget that, at a basic level, these cops need to be punished.  They work at the grace of the taxpayers yet violate the deep ideals of communities - they seize power and act accordingly, violating laws at whim, using physical assault and intimidation as a first resort, exercising the greatest inhumanities under immunity.  They enforce and are therefore in some large way responsible for creating the violent society which we have accepted as norm.  Sure, there are arguments in their favor, but what I am saying is that we need to assert our own power as their funders and say - Hey! You are doing a lousy job!  You are punished!  Go to bed without dinner!  You don't get to spend your day rewarding yourself, and guess why?  Because it's for your own fucking good.  Maybe if you stopped treating your own little temples like shit silos, you might come to recognize the holiness in every human being around you, and start doing your job with some fucking respect. 

BAN THE DONUT 2015

F I R E

Smolder

Burn

Ignite

Active State Energy Transforming

Desire

Determination

Painful emotions

Consumption

Heat

Digestion

Bomb

Smoke

Obsession

Torch

Illumination and Shadows

Purify

Cure

Cook, Stew, Roast, Toast, Melt

Log, Tinder, Kindling

Stoke

Forge

Metals